Nowadays, there are so many different directions we are told to go in the ways of relating to our spouses. Many of these supposed “fix alls” of marriage are extraordinarily complex. Never mind the fact that many of us are overstimulated on an ongoing, everyday basis, and don’t really need to add massive amounts of clinical reading to our lives. When we think of “fixing” our marriages, we must not think of the newest fad, the “formula” for success, or the most innovative ways of being together. If it’s going to work, it won’t be complicated.
If you once had love together, do the things you knew beyond a shadow of a doubt in the earlier, and well, simpler days. Leave complexity to the therapists who actually enjoy that (yes, we’re nerds), say a prayer and do your part. Love. Take a walk with your spouse, stay up late and munch together, get them an unexpected gift or an unexpected night off, offer them a massage, or do anything else that once spoke of your love to them. Love, the answer, isn’t exactly simple all of the time, but it is clear and can be quite an adventure since to love at all is to take a risk. However, if you don’t risk your heart in the way of loving someone else, what kind of heart do you have? Love. Risk. Live.